Better Husband

018|Why Your Arguments Never Get Resolved—And What to Do Instead

Episode 68

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Do you and your wife keep having the same arguments over and over? Do your conflicts feel like a frustrating loop, leaving you both unheard and disconnected?

That’s because most couples fall into losing strategies—default behaviors that keep conflicts alive instead of resolving them. The worst part? These patterns feel right in the moment, but they actually push your wife further away.

In today’s episode, I’ll help you identify the five losing strategies, recognize when they’re happening, and give you the tools to break free—so you can stop fighting in circles and start actually solving problems in your marriage.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

✅ Why certain conflicts never seem to get resolved
✅ The five losing strategies that are sabotaging your marriage
✅ How these behaviors stem from your Adaptive Child
✅ What to do instead to create real connection
✅ A step-by-step way to change your response in the moment

Key Takeaways:

💡 Your instincts in conflict might be making things worse.
💡 Defensiveness, control, and shutting down push your wife further away.
💡 You can retrain yourself to respond differently and transform your marriage.

Practical Action Steps:

1️⃣ Recognize your go-to losing strategy – Which one do you default to?
2️⃣ Pause in the moment – Take a breath before reacting.
3️⃣ Shift your focus – Is your response helping or hurting?
4️⃣ Try a new approach – Validate instead of defending, ask instead of controlling.
5️⃣ Practice daily – Small shifts over time lead to major relationship changes.

Reflection Questions:

❓ What’s your biggest trigger that leads to conflict?
❓ Which losing strategy do you find yourself using the most?
❓ How would your marriage change if you responded differently next time?

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Ready to Take Action?

If you’re serious about prioritizing your marriage and making real changes, I’ve opened up coaching spots for men who are truly ready to commit to growth.

📅 Book a Coaching Callangelosantiago.com
🎯 Download the Better Husband Toolkitbetterhusbandtoolkit.com
📺 Subscribe on YouTubeBetter Husband Channel
📩 Email Me → angelo@angelosantiago.com